How to Handle Home Buyer’s Remorse
A home is the most expensive thing that most of us will ever buy and we all want to be certain that we've purchased the right one. You loved your future home when you signed the contract to purchase it, but a few days have passed and now you are wondering if you made the right decision.
You can't help thinking maybe you acted too quickly, or a better house might come along. You're wondering if you've agreed to pay too much for the house or questioning how you'll make your house payments if you run into financial troubles. Dozens of questions start running through your mind. The bad news is these questions probably won't be answered until you have actually become the owner of the home.
However, unless there is a real reason for your concern, you are probably just suffering from home buyer's remorse. Below are some suggestions on how to get through the rough spots.
Find Your Wants and Needs List
Hopefully you created some sort of list of your wants or needs before purchasing the home. Find it, review your notes, and remind yourself that this really is what you were looking for.
Ask yourself:
Are the important things from my list included in the home?
Think of other houses you walked through. What was it that made this house different than the others? There was a reason you picked this house to bid on.
Was this particular house a rarity or were there several other houses that met your needs? Why did you pick this one?
If you found a way to back out of the contract, do you realistically think you will find a better house?
There was something about this house just a few days ago that made it different, made it special. Have any of those things changed? If so, what changed and how?
Once you work through the facts, as well as sort out your feelings, you may find that you would be nervous moving forward on any house. However, it is possible that you've made a poor choice and you can talk to your agent, your lender or sometimes even the seller in order to work through those concerns or find a way out, if necessary.
Keep in mind that sometimes we start talking to others about the new house and it is only then that we start feeling remorseful. Below are some scenarios that bring on buyer's remorse, and maybe knowing them and being aware of them can help you avoid this happening to you.
Discussions with family and friends
Families mean well, but often family and friends tend to question our choices and even what we paid for, especially if this is a first home purchase and they think they are old pros. Think about though, it may have been years since they were in the market, bought a home themselves or even considered current prices. It's likely they are out of touch. And what if they live in a totally different area than you, an area where housing might cost quite a bit different than what is expected in your location. Also keep in mind that many parents don't think anything is good enough for their offspring. Although families mean well, don't let their ideas, thoughts or suggestions sway you. Trust your own decision.
Continuing to Look
Stop. Once you've found a house you like, stop looking at others. Even if you feel the contract has a good chance of falling through, try to have some patience. Once you've found a home you like enough to offer a contract on, don't let yourself fall into the trap of always looking for something a tiny bit better. Trust your decision.
Unguided by Agents
If you are working with an agent, then their job is to help you. Contact your agent and anyone else involved in closing whenever you have doubts or questions. Some agents only guide their buyers to closing, rather than through closing. If your agent isn't around to answer questions or assure you that what you are feeling is normal, doubts and questions begin to arise. Doubts can lead to panic and panic can lead to buyer's remorse. Be sure your agent is.
Doubting Yourself
Because there are no certainties in life, sometimes we think about the negative rather than looking at the positive. Every time you find yourself starting to dwell on what could go wrong, allow yourself to think of the reasons that prompted you in the first place. Trust yourself.
When Your Concerns are Valid
There are times that purchases should come to a halt. Be sure that the conditions of your contract allow you to back out with no penalties if:
You cannot get financing.
The house does not appraise at a price at or above the contract sales price.
The home inspections uncover more repair issues than you are willing to take on.
The property boundary lines are not as represented by the seller.
A title search uncovers undisclosed easements that give someone else the right to use the property.
The title search uncovers undisclosed liens that won't be satisfied at closing.
There are problems with the property's deed. For instance, the wife of a former owner never released her rights to the property.
Time-Shares and Condos
Many states give buyers the right to cancel a contract if they have a change of heart after signing a purchase contract with the original developer-these same laws don't usually cover resale units. Check your states laws to see what options you have.
Prepare Yourself in Advance
Possibly the best thing you can do is to realize that home buyer's remorse is common. Understanding how and why buyer's remorse occurs can help you work through it if it happens to you.